- JC Penny: We're gonna have Ellen DeGeneres as a spokeswoman for our company.
- Homophobes: DON'T BUY ANYTHING FROM THERE! SHE IS A BAD INFLUENCE ON OUR CHILDREN! SHE'S SPREADING HER AIDS.
- Obama: I support gay marriage.
- Homophobes: OBAMA STARTS A WAR ON MARRIAGE.
- Oreo: We're gonna get a little pride up in this cookie.
- Homophobes: DON'T EAT THEIR GAY COOKIES. THEY WILL MAKE YOU GAY. THAT FOOD COLORING HAS GAYNESS IN IT. DON'T. EAT. IT. YOU'LL GET AIDS.